well, here we are
back to the start,
more or less —
feels like less — feels like worse,
but if I pay attention
and control the thoughts
I can see that it’s more —
it’s really more, it’s better —
and it’s more important than ever
to see what’s real,
to do the hard thing,
to confront the madness
and strip away all the petty, shiny,
cover-it-all-up bullshit
that the people like to offer—
the whole world says you gotta be this
and feel that
— buy this and do that
everyone who declares this is pretty
and that’s ugly…
well, just fuck it — fuck that nonsense
I’m here saying you can see what you choose to see —
you can construct the greatest meaning out of rubble
— you can raise a palace from filth and dust
and then show the world who the fuck you are
and what the hell you did to come back from the shit,
to rise above the wicked garbage,
transcend the doubters and the enemies,
even the monsters within yourself,
all the ones who smacked you so cruelly back
to the start —
so now you go chase your second chance
and all the chances that come flooding after
Garbage Notes:
This one’s about redemption. We’re all going to find ourselves, at one point or another, having to start over. Whether it’s due to a setback or a set of conscious choices. Sometimes you have to hit the reset button. It can be tough, but going back to the beginning isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
I remember feeling hesitant and unsure of myself when I began writing. After having a certain degree of success in another field, it felt frustrating to be a novice at something again. But there was also an odd freedom to being back at zero with no expectations and very little sense of what my limits were.
When everything feels new again, it’s extra important to pay attention and control your thoughts. Your fears and imagination can run wild. So you must remain steady and focused. This is going to be crucial when you come up against obstacles.
When you’re new at something you have to keep a close eye on unforeseen threats. You don’t really know what you’re going to struggle with. This is where you have to find positive people—supporters, mentors, and collaborators who have your best interest at heart.
You never know who might take advantage of you, and you won’t even understand how they might do it. So you have to be cautious about who these people are. You’ll be tempted to follow who you think is the most successful or popular. But this isn’t the way.
The later part of the poem is about embracing your second chance. It’s about coming to terms with the reasons for why you had to start over in the first place. Forgiving yourself and anyone around you who might have failed you. And moving forward with a renewed enthusiasm for life and for all the potential successes that are ahead of you.
So, yes, it is possible to raise a palace from the rubble of a once broken-down place. It takes time. It takes willpower. But we all have it within ourselves to do it.
Franco Amati 2024
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loves this, so many parts of it. but particularly, as I am personally learning, the choice not to listen to the voices in my head that spout their ceaseless bullshit to tear me down.
"fuck that nonsense
I’m here saying you can see what you choose to see —
you can construct the greatest meaning out of rubble
— you can raise a palace from filth and dust"
Great message and so well expressed! I walked away from my old life at age fifty and went to graduate school to follow a dream. Folks thought I was crazy. Best thing I ever did.