this is to get all the people
out of my head,
the echoing voices,
the endless chatter,
and all the familiar faces
who make not-so-subtle
appearances in dreams
doing things they could never
get away with in life…
we are all quite sensitive
to the noise, the social dilemmas,
the constant notifications
always nibbling away
at our precious attention—
nightmares of the hyper-human,
working shifts in our sleep,
doing the movements,
making the choices, dancing
the dance…
eat me alive one more time —
make it the last
so that I might be rid of the thoughts…
clear space for the words, my worlds,
my magic, my shining moments
so, I sit here
and by sheer will
I disrupt the cycle,
ending the madness
and I put balanced feet
back on the path —
I walk on strong and sturdy legs
in the direction of a light, ahead…
a light I’ve created myself
beaming from a place
that is forward in time,
devised with no input
from the hideous, superficial
crowd—pearls untrampled,
swine in their pens,
and the dogs have all
fallen asleep
Garbage Notes:
I sometimes find that one of the biggest obstacles to writing something honest and real is the concern over what other people might think of it. And I don’t mean just the people who know me now. I mean all the people who have ever known me, including the ones who have exited my life or the ones I no longer care to talk to. Anyone who might stumble across something I’ve written, and go, huh, I wonder what that’s about?
But to really create something special, you have to put that shit aside and think about who the words are really for. Primarily, they’re for me. As a writer, you have to write to please yourself. But they’re also for other people out there who are like me. People who are struggling. People who just want to make it. People who are poor or who never really got a decent shot at things. People who have been let down or betrayed by others. Abused or neglected in some unfathomable way.
You can’t please everyone. You have to disrupt the cycle of negative, critical voices in your head and save your pearls for the folks who will value them. Your words aren’t for the uncaring or the disruptive. Your words aren’t for the people who can’t appreciate you or relate to you in any way. Your words have power, so you owe it to the people who need them. So that’s why I always focus on delivering my words in the best way possible.
I think the part of the poem that still resonates with me now is this: “I walk on strong and sturdy legs in the direction of a light, ahead… a light I’ve created myself beaming from a place that is forward in time…” This echoes the sentiment that the words will carry me forward, to a better and more positive place in the future, one that I created for myself and one where I don’t owe an explanation to anybody.
Franco Amati 2023
I can't speak for everyone, but I know for a fact I always look forward to your words. "Pearls and swine"...reminds me of the Audioslave song "I am the Highway" and of course Matthew 7:6. Perfectly expressed in your real poetic prose.
I love your writing. It is always so honest, vulnerable and real. My psychodrama trainer always said "real is better then perfect" Your writing demonstrates that for me. Please keep it coming.