today is the day…
she’s getting a brand new toilet
and now she can go to outer space —
jet propelled, rocket-fueled flush
and those tiles underneath
will be immaculate —
no bathroom complaints for this one
she’s getting a brand new toilet,
one that doesn’t lose water, or hiss
and burp in the middle of the night,
one that doesn’t smile with a cracked
porcelain lid, or aspirate like a weakling…
plumbers rejoice
she’s got it, baby,
the heavens will part
she’s getting a brand new toilet —
so excited it makes me want to…
write poetry…
we all need comfort on the throne,
we all want the paper to go down so strong,
we all want to go with ease and relaxation,
no fret, no stress…
no more staring at the wet towel rack,
and yearning for salvation
sure, the wallet’s a little lighter now,
but she’s getting a brand new toilet
and so now her ass and her mind are free
Garbage Notes: